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Stressors 

August 10, 2016 by Kayce L.

Family and relationship conflicts, finances, looking for or starting a new job or resuming your old one, health worries — these are just a few of the many stressors you’ll likely be dealing with during recovery. Unfortunately, stress is a normal and unavoidable part of life, including part of living a sober life. So that means learning new, healthier ways to deal with tension and frustration.
Meditation and talking out what stresses us. Can help identify and relieve some of the stress. How do you deal with stressors? 


35 Comments »

  1. Andy. says:

    Stressors. Wow! I have a 14 year old severely autistic son home for August from school. If he struggles the whole family feels it. I used to simply drink to deal with the stress. I have 258 days and counting and if it were not for AA I would definitely be back drinking. Working hard on step 3 to accept gods will.

    • Thomas Cromer says:

      I pray for u Andy God will keep u strong !!!!!!!

    • Dan says:

      Hi Andy,
      Thank you very much for sharing. Your post is inspiring, because I feel that stress is the number 1 reason I drink. I tend to impose a lot of stress on myself with work and school. I often wake up still drunk, which causes me to stress even more cause I can't get work done. I was sober for 9 months 3 years ago, and I am going to make another attempt starting now.

      It's inspiring that you stay sober despite the situation you described.

      Thanks,
      Dan

  2. Dave w says:

    Stress! It's a big part of what I hid from. In all honesty
    I still try to avoid it. However it is inevitable that we will
    Have stress in our life.
    I guess it helps us know we are alive.
    Instead of having a drink or a toke( showing my age)
    I now try to handle the issue quickly.
    Also I have been praying more. And enjoying nature.
    Bonsai gardening has taught me patience and I find
    Serenity with plants.

  3. Chloeb says:

    Great topic and great share Dave !! I have to make sure I have my spirituality in tact and keep extremely close to my program ... And this program has taught me I don't have to drink NO MATTER WHAT!! That is so awesome knowing I never have to feel the way I use to feel again ... I know there are people that have been through or are going through anything I could possibly go through. And I pray and say the serenity prayer.. Sonetimes over and over ...I read the big book (page 417) acceptance....when I accept people places and things the way they are I have serenity and that keeps me somewhat sane in a stressful situation... I hope that helps someone 🙂

  4. Dave C says:

    It's been a very unpleasant week, (stressful) to say the least. Then I came across this. When we can't control what's happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond to what's happening. That's where your power is

    • Dave w says:

      Thank you Dave c I needed to hear that now.
      I am in a fight ( verbal) with my addict son right now.
      My sobriety seems like a slap in his face. He gets loud and violent and I sometimes react by getting louder and yelling.
      I now have a huge headache.
      I need to disengage and let him fall and continue to fail.
      I heard once to not rob him of hitting his bottom.
      We all have different bottoms. He has been there a few times already and it's hard to wait for the next one.
      All I can do is let go but sometimes I want to smack his ass!
      Sorry I am rambling and venting.

  5. Dave C says:

    I can relate two sons in the disease. My oldest committed to a28 day program via his employer a.k.a. the Air Force. Blood test revealed Alcoholic Hep, I had never heard of this before even though I've been around the program 22+ years. Almost glad he lives 2000 miles away. Just talk to him via text claims he still going to meetings and once a month on base with aftercare. So things can change. Rather kids be in their teens or in your late 30s there still our children and always a concern.

  6. Dave w says:

    Thank you AA brothers and sisters.
    Today I kept him breathing again until paramedics arrived to hit him with
    That drug.
    Third time I have had to try and keep him alive.
    I hate watching his eyes roll up in his head. Reminds me of
    Having my dad die in my arms.
    His eyes rolled up as well.
    Tough day today again. Thanks for the prayers.
    He needs God.

  7. Dave w says:

    Thank you.
    Last night after dropping him off at a detox facility
    I sat in my yard to talk wi my higher power.
    I am Greatfull that he lived.
    Then I could hear sounds from a high school football game
    It brought back good memories but made me cry.
    I may be in a bit of shock from another one of his OD's.
    Hope this is his time to let go and let God.
    Glad I can share here I will probably breakdown when
    I share at my home group.
    Thank you.

    • Sheryl says:

      I must say that I so appreciate and admire the heartfelt comments.
      I always tell my brother that it takes a very strong man to openly share his feelings. I also needed to hear that I am not the only one struggling with adult children right now.
      Keep up the sharing it helps all of us.

  8. Dave w says:

    I am moved to tears by all the thoughtful wishes thank you.
    Let's always pray for those still out there suffering.
    Help who you can when you can.
    Remember healing happens when broken meets
    Broken.
    My thoughts are with all of you.

    • Thomas Cromer says:

      Yeah Dave my daughter moved out 2 years ago she was 24 my heart was broken but now it's healing and now I'm getting a lot better because God heals us all !!!!!!!

  9. Dave w says:

    I got you Thomas.
    I am praying for you as well.
    Son is transferring to sober house today.
    In gods hands.
    As much as I want some control I know that is not how
    It works.

    • Thomas Cromer says:

      I know Dave . Yeah Dave I'm good no more pain because life goes on I'm on vacation for two weeks me and my wife are thinking about going to see her in New Mexico we don't know yet !!!!!!!

  10. Dave C says:

    Healing happens when Broken meets Broken. Powerful statement, Dave. Maybe one only an alcoholic would understand

  11. Dave w says:

    I cannot take the credit. I should have used quotation marks.
    I heard that healing happens from the chaplain at an
    Addiction treatment family group.
    We were trying to explain to normies why we need each
    Other to get well.

  12. Dave w says:

    For all the other parents and loved ones
    Of alcoholics and addicts. We have found a
    Group that is very helpful, they are not in every state yet.
    But the movement growing and they have a website.
    Parents of addicted loved ones or PALS.
    Attending as an alcoholic who is also a parent
    Affords the opportunity to explain our disease to others.
    I find some comfort there. Not like I do at my meetings but
    I'll take what help I can.

  13. Mk21 says:

    Stress. May be a problem, but one of my bigger problems is talking about what stresses me, since no one in my life seems to think I have any stress So I've started tai chi and yoga to go along with prayer and meditation

  14. This election is REAKING ME OUT!!!

  15. Gloria says:

    Using inventory help me deal with stress. Finding out if there is anything I can change. If I find something do it. If not remember that not only am I powerless over my addition, I'm powerless over most of the things that happen. Then turning everything including me over to God(my understanding). And then look for someone I can help.

  16. Christa says:

    Spousal discord, parental judgment, sponsoree doubt, peer criticism, 8K/month expenses, chronic illness on top of alcoholism, menopausal evil, not to mention l lost my career position of over 20 years last month: these are the 'stressors' on me today as l sit here recovered over 27 years. What l can attest to is this: God MUST be redirecting me towards Him. The how, what & where have yet to be revealed to me, but God knows. The answer to the 'why' could be that He's preparing me for the shitstorm yet to come. The who is God & me. As already mentioned, inventory, coupled with intensive work with other alkys has kept me closer to Him. I have not even thought of a drink. The crazy thoughts scurrying thru my alcoholic mind are centered around how l can beg, borrow & steal cash to meet bill demands. Utter Fail calls for drastic actions that only can be taken with God's guidance & protection. I must keep close to Him, perform His work well & keep moving forward lest l make the supreme sacrifice.

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